Sunday, January 22, 2006

My New addiction

I 've been sick this past week and my friend Monika loaned me the LOST dvd's the first season. Initially I wasn't too keen on watching them . But all I can say is that stuff is like"CRACK!" You watch one episode and you're just lying there begging for more.I'm trying to pace myself because I know they won't last forever and I'm torn because the second season is already in full swing and I want to see them in order! What's a girl to do? By the way. I think the show's writing is not only brilliant but clean too. Anyone else out there addicted like I am? This is better than Lifetime TV movies..seriously!

Friday, January 06, 2006

Online Dating Tips

Tips for OnlineDating from
Kerri Pomarolli official Online guru....do it yourself single
www.kerripom.com
Leslie you can play with these editing wise but send me what you're using..these are so much fun to write

1. Never sign on any dating site
a. after running into your ex and his/her new fiancee
b. after the hour of 1:00am
c. After watching any film starring Meg Ryan, Julia Roberts or anything I repeat anything on Lifetime Television for Women.

2. Do not put in your profile that your interests include "Long Walks on the Beach" if you reside in Ohio or other such states.

3. Men if you list your favorite movie as"Fried Green Tomatoes" to appear more in touch with your feminine side it would be a good idea to actually have seen the movie "Fried Green Tomatoes" or at least know one of the stars.

4. Never use your high school senior picture on your profile especially if you graduated before 1994. Also "Glamour headshots with feather boa and halo lighting do not make you look more like an angel! You may get such a response as 'Nice headshot..are you missing an arm?"

5. If asked what you are looking for in a mate a good response is to be honest such as "Someone who is willing to lie about how we met." Honesty is so important. Or if asked what you'd like to do on a first date an appropriate response might me "Well we met online so I'd like to go to the police station to get fingerprinted" Remember be open. Someone may be in prison now but think how much time they have to read their Bible and other great works or literature?
6. Everyone from Canada automatically seems more attractive in that imaginary "I met her in Canada and she's a model over summer break" kind of way but think about it..do you ever actually see them in person?Try to stay within your own country.


Kerri Pomarolli
www.kerripom.com
Thank you and God Bless!

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Tips For Suviving Valentine's Day As A Single

How To Survive Valentine's Day As A Single

1. Remember to wear all black and call it "Black Wed" and picket any couple's event saying they are discriminating against you and your civil rights by not letting you in alone.

2. Make a vow to boycott doing any type of childcare of Feb 14th, Dec 31st or any other major holiday for that matter. Be strong, together we can make a difference.

3. Turn off the TV and radio so you won't be subjected to any movies starring Meg Ryan, Julia Roberts or any other bubbly single girl falling in love in 120 minutes specifically on Valentine's day and hearing any love songs by Elton John.

4. Turn off your phone to avoid any unwarranted phone calls for meddlesome married friends trying to set you up with their recently released from prison cousins or mothers calling to ask for the 1000th time, "Did you meet anyone? You're not getting any younger dear!"

5. Go to the store and stock up on supplies.
a. Ben and Jerry's (the big tub)
b. Chocolate Chip Cookies (the big tub)
c. Instant chocolate brownie mix with the frosting you can lick out of the can if need be.

6. Hide underneath your window. When you see unsuspecting happy couples walking below with those annoying heart shaped balloons shoot them with a bee bee gun. (the balloons not the couples) If you get caught, say you were filling in for cupid on his lunch break and you couldn't find a bow and arrow.

7. Remember Valentine's Day is a made up holiday by corporations to sell ugly lace filled cards and carbohydrate-filled, artery clogging candies. Think of this as saving your health by not participating and you'll probably live longer.

Welcome!

This is the first blog post on Kerri's Blog!