Tuesday, July 17, 2007

I Try to Be a Good Wife

Now I'm not one to brag on my domestic skills. I'm not like my mother. She knows how to make a fabulous hot meal and keep a tidy house with no effort whatsoever. I didn't inherit these skills. I was too busy doing ballet tap and jazz to learn to cook. When I dated Ron I made sure he knew what he was getting into. My other friends have to make dinner for their husbands all the time. I tell them" Listen; I've lowered Ron's expectations so much every time I fry an egg he gets excited. Learn from the master. But sometimes I try to go the extra mile for my husband because I'm just that cool.”

Marriage has been a trial. They didn’t tell me in pre marital that there would be a man in my house trying to steal my closet space and he would intend on living there forever. I just didn’t know what to do. Then God sent that fire and only Ron’s shirts got burned. So I took it as a sign. I thought to make him feel better. I would try to make him an actual meal. I hadn’t really tried to cook for him before but I was feeling loving so I gave it a shot.

He enjoys the fine art of eating and sleeping. He's really good at it. I decided to try one of my mom's easier recipes I'd seen her do a thousand times. It’s called Broccoli Cheese Cornbread. It’s a southern favorite. It's easy all you need is cornbread mix from the box, cheese, and broccoli. This would be a snap. I was doing find until about midway through I realized I was using not the Cheese Cornbread mix but the Blueberry Corn muffin mix. I didn't think it would matter that much. Maybe he would enjoy the extra fruity flavors? I just picked some of the blueberries out and kept cooking.

I made the rest of the recipe and served it to him with a big smile. I saw him bite into the cornbread experiment and almost choke. Truth be told it was disgusting. If we had a dog I still wouldn't feed this blueberry purple and green mess to him. The dog would probably die. Ron did his best to swallow and be polite. Inside I was laughing but I wanted to see how long it would take him to comment on how bad my cooking was. He didn't say anything. He ate the whole thing. He only put two bites in his napkin when he thought I wasn't looking. It was amazing. I confessed to him later that night that I knew it sucked and asked him why he didn't tell me how bad it was. He said, "Kerri beggars can't be choosers and food is food. I just thought it couldn’t get much worse than this so I wanted to encourage you to keep trying. And with your lack of cooking I’m losing a lot of weight. So overall this set up is a win win either way!"