Thursday, March 31, 2011

Fleetwood Mac....Feeling Cool!

So the clock radio in the car strikes 5:40 am and I'm driving to the YMCA to torture myself in week two of boot camp because I'm 20 pounds overweight after giving birth to a child who doesn't seem to care about the havoc she has caused to my body. I'm in some bright pink sweats and a T-shirt that is too tight that says " This is my sassy shirt." For the first time in years I have a gut and it's not sexy. Nothing about me is sexy.  In fact I felt very very middle-aged as I tried to fit into my skinny jeans last night and failed.  Ironic, last year at this time I was in the best shape of my life after finishing a weight loss infomercial with Ron.

So I look down and see in the dash of the car-- Dora the Explorer toys from McDonalds, a razor of Ron's, a Red Bull Can, and a Mexican Coin. But I'm not seeing those things because I'm listening to Fleetwood Mac's  lyrics. "Thunder Only happens when it's rainin’..Players only love you when they're playin." I'm instantly transported to another lifetime. Another young 23 year old totally carefree girl who was head over heels, and every other body part in lust with some Marine she met on the Hermosa Pier at a bar called Sharkeez in some cute little sundress.

It seems like a million years ago but hearing that song brought every sensory image from that relationship and time in my life flooding though my brain. I wasn't driving to boot camp. I was driving to San Diego on a whim to go to some exclusive party with my "love/lust of the moment," and walking along beaches with him picking flowers from people's yards at 1:00am, and me thinking it was the most romantic thing on the planet...stealing..so cute!

He was a charmer to say the least (he's in my first book). But it's not about him. It's about the girl I once was. Who was that? Do I envy her? Do I want to go back? Am I jealous I'm not jumping off to Cancun for "Girlfriend vacations," or spending hours lamenting over which outfit to wear while jamming out to Prince Songs in my bathroom? I think my biggest anxiety back then was "Did I like him more than he liked me?" Nothing had changed since kindergarden when I had the same issue with Brandon Duck. I thought about my Marine (yes I looked to see if he was on face book and he's not)! I thought as I was listening to the music and letting it fill my senses, I wonder what life would have been like if I ended up with my Marine? We had a dramatic parting and I think I was secretly waiting for him to show up somewhere when he "shipped back in" and carry me off like Richard Gere, but it never happened. I heard he's a lawyer somewhere in the Midwest and well, I'm me. I am a comedian with a husband, two kids, and a Suva going to boot camp 3 times a week to try to regain my “youthful figure" whatever that is.

 It was a moment this morning that made me literally grin from ear to ear. I turned up the jams and bobbed my head a little bit feeling "cool." So just for a moment I realized that girl is still in there, 20 pounds or so heavier, but she's in there. I have some cool little sun dresses in the back of my closet along with my “little white goal pants." I also have two amazing little girls who genetically would not be in existence unless Kerri Pomarolli and Ron McGehee turned off the cable TV a couple of times ( sorry for the visual mom). But I love my life. I really do. I love that Friday nights are now spent with take out Mexican Food and ice cream on the couch anxiously waiting for the girls to sleep so Ron and I can try go make it through an Episode of Burn Notice, Biggest Loser, or Food Network without falling asleep . So for today Jan 2011 I'll jam out to my Fleetwood Mac and know that I still" got it"(Whatever “it” is)! I just know that there are 3 people in this world named Ron, Ruby, and Lucy that think I'm really really cool!

Ok wait..my 3 year old just approached me wearing nothing but a fur coat asking for more jello to put all over her body. I told her "No honey that' s a different kind of outreach ministry all together." Go back to Diego and eat your dry cereal breakfast like mama made you.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Some Funny Stuff for you

I have, on occasion, been known to call in as a guest on a the Drew Marshall radio show. I did that recently and was able to get audio copies of my appearance, so I decided to share them with you. You can download and listen to them by clicking on the links below. Thanks for listening!

Monday, March 14, 2011

Moments In Time

I'm sitting here with Ruby by my side. REO Speedwagon is having a reunion on PBS and songs from my pre teen years are blaring through my tv screen. Ron is asleep and so is Lucy.I'm recovering from a humbling night of entertaining 500 screaming kids and their 500 parents at an awards sports night. I survived with my dignity in tact except for the fact that my 3 yr old Lucy asked some guy" Why are you brown?"
Tomorrow I'm performing for a group of lovely ladies, mostly seniors, and then racing back to LA for a commercial audition for Converse Tennis shoes. Then I'm off to Lucy's ballet class then meeting with our pastors for a prayer meeting . What a life. I got a phone call from a very ollllllllllllllld friend who happens to be in CA on business. When I say old he's actually exactly my age and I met him when we were 14 with our families on vacation. He was my first real grown up love!
It was serious. We were 14!
He's a big boy now with two sweet daughters like me and many huge businesses and fancy cars, unlike me!LOL We've grown up and out of our Richard Marx songs crushes and gotten married and had kids on oppossite coasts. I actually talk to his lovely wife more than I do him on facebook. I had to laugh because we were trying to squeeze in a visit and I heard myself say" I can't drive at night because my vision is bad!" He started laughing so hard. I couldn't believe that came out of my mouth.
Did I need to talk about my dentures next? When we were 15 we would have run across the country by foot to visit eachother even if it was for 5 minutes. Now I'm trying to fit him in between pre school car pool and my Christian comedy show for the senior ladies at the country club. I'm typing this as I ' m literally hearing" I Can't Fight This Feeling Any Longer" plays in the background. Hearing old music and old friends voices make me a bit nostalgic sometimes for the days when grown up life didn't get in the way of all our plans. Before it was our parents who were getting in the way, now it's kids! Such is life.

Then I walked over and held my darling Ruby in my arms. We played and she laughed out loud at me for the first time . I'm a comedian this was a big moment and I got big laughs. I rocked with her to my 80's tunes and as I saw her smile I said" Ruby you're worth it. I love you so much and even though being your grown up mommy is hard sometimes. I wouldn't change a thing.You're the best audience in the world." I can enjoy the past and sigh, but my smiles come from my present. I love my Lucy , my Ruby , and my Ron. It's 11:30pm time to go to bed .Oh wait I think Ruby wants to jam a little more with me.